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Better a Butternut than a Butter Face

Jenna Schurmeier, your body may have beaten your taste buds through puberty by about 16 years, but I, for one, am sure glad that your palate finally caught up to those ginormous tits of yours.  Now, if you could just develop some hand eye coordination and digital dexterity, you’d be the whole package.  Speaking of the whole package – that soup!!  I woke up this morning feeling energized, happy, and ready to take on the day, and I’d like to believe that it was that soup that gave me the will to finish out the work week.  But let me not get ahead of myself.

Like the plan-aheader that I am (yeah right), I got the ingredients earlier in the week on what turned out to be a very expensive Trader Joe’s trip.  Not because the soup ingredients were particularly expensive, but because I hadn’t be grocery shopping since before Christmas and I was starving and thirsty during the shopping trip.  A lethal combination, I assure you.  The plan was to cook on Wednesday night and my intended guinea pig was my friend Dan.  Dan is the quintessential bachelor who never has groceries, and when he cooks, only eats meat and potatoes.  I thought I would treat him to a nourishing and wholesome meal (yes my maternal instincts are definitely kicking in).  We also planned to enjoy some wine and several rounds of Jeopardy in the course of the evening.  What I didn’t know what that Kimberly was planning on infiltrating cooking night and asked Dan and I if we wanted to do trivia instead and cook on Thursday.  True to my “I Guess I Can Be Convinced” moniker, it didn’t take much for me to cave.  Needless to say, the evening went in a totally different direction then I intended – we played a horrible game of trivia and ordered two rounds of Fireball shots to celebrate our stupidity, then ate pizza, drank fancy cocktails, and Dan and I stayed up until 2 playing Jeopardy.  Anyway, let’s just say that I was more than happy to spend a quiet evening cooking the next night.

I think my only complaint about the recipe is that peeling and cubing a butternut squash is about as hard as trying to train a tiger while stranded at sea (guess what I’ve been reading).  Next time, I think I’ll buy the package that’s already cubed.


In the interest of time and laziness, I opted for rotisserie chicken instead of using frozen thighs.  I’m happy with this decision for numerous reasons, including the fact that I weirdly enjoy pulling all the meat off and also, sampling the pieces of juicy chicken is SO GOOD.  Other than that, there’s not much to report on the cooking process besides that the onion I chose was so potent; I literally had tears rolling down my face as I cursed its name.


Before I even served up the soup, I knew I was going to love it.  The mashed squash gave the broth such a thick and hearty texture, the quinoa added a subtle, grainy crunch, and the chicken was moist and tender and floated happily in the concoction.  My diners (roommates Taylor and Mary + Mary’s friend) all said that they loved the soup too and finished their bowls to prove it.  If I wasn’t so full from snacking on the ingredients while cooking, I think it would have been nice to serve this with a piece of nice crusty bread and butter.  However, it was definitely robust enough to stand on its own.  Oh, and how could I forget!  Of course, Sriracha was added, and Taylor commented that it complemented the soup so well that it would be included in the original recipe.



I had about a serving leftover which I’m so excited to eat.  I think next time, I’ll double the recipe and freezing the leftovers so it can be the gift that keeps on giving.  To Kim and Juj – get on this because it’s  Jenna, I think you surprised us all on this one.  Keep up the good work,

Love you all with a degree equal to the difficulty of cutting a butternut squash.

-Kelsey “I Guess I Can Be Convinced” Lee


One response »

  1. you’re just too dam witty Lee, I laughed, I cried.. I love your post.


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